It has been a while…

On September 30th, one of my friends, Bria, passed away after battling lymphoma for a year. I didn’t realize at how quickly the year had passed. It seems that the older I get the more quickly time goes by. I mean, it had been more than two months since I last posted anything on here.

I don’t really have anything to say at the moment, except that I really miss her. I thought that she was getting better, but I guess that she just didn’t want us to worry.

A secure way to contact me

So, I’ve decided to go ahead and get a little bit more concerned with security… Therefore, if you need to contact me about anything that could potentially need security, please do so at the following URL:

https://ifigure.wtf/contact-me/

By using the above link, you’ll be able to encrypt the message inside the browser, so it’s never even sent outside in plain text at all.

Go and give it a shot, or you can also do it here:

Your Name :
Your E-mail Address :
Your Message :


Anything that annoys you… (Quote)

Anything that annoys you is for teaching you patience. Anyone who abandons you is for teaching you how to stand up on your own two feet. Anything that angers you is for teaching you forgiveness and compassion. Anything that has power over you is for teaching you how to take your power back. Anything you hate is for teaching you unconditional love. Anything you fear is for teaching you courage to overcome your fear. Anything you can’t control is for teaching you how to let go and trust the Universe.

Jackson Kiddard

I need to unplug and recharge for a bit.

So, this upcoming weekend, I will be disconnecting myself. Tomorrow, as soon as I’m done with work, I’m going to turn off my laptop, desktop, and just chill with a friend of mine who I haven’t seen in a couple of years.

I have a meeting with someone on Monday, and then after that, I’m going to my home town. I had been planning this for over a month. I haven’t been home for more than a day in almost three years. I’m going to intentionally disconnect while I’m there.

However, instead of me renting a car, a friend is going to take me so that I can save some money.

I will have my phone, but I’ll be using it for taking photos and for media purposes only. I’m going to turn off background syncing of items and my notifications will be disabled.

I’m going to use my PTO as I’m supposed to… Completely off from work. πŸ˜‰

Maybe some time out in the country will do me some good. I’ve been inside the city for quite some time. (Side item: yes, I went to San Antonio a couple of months ago, but it was still a city…)

πŸ˜›

 

Suddenly, my mind stopped racing…

Suddenly, my mind stopped racing and I could finally live in the moment. It happened without thought or planning… I was just sitting there, drinking my coffee, and then it just happened. I didn’t plan for any of this to happen. Then, out of the blue without prompting, it was as if everything stopped and I felt peace. I was looking at the beautiful people sitting outside the cafe, wondering what their conversations were about because I had my earphones in and blasting music. Today, everyone seems beautiful to me in their own way. Maybe this is what I’ve been needing or seeking.

Inside the restroom, some graffiti on the wall mentioned “what you seek is seeking you”. I wonder why they wrote that today, I know it was written today because the walls were clean earlier this morning. It was as if the Universe was reaching out to me through a stranger’s words.

 

via Daily Prompt: Suddenly

The Music

The music moves you, almost as if it was written for you at to hear at the specific moment that it reaches your ears. The rollercoaster of emotions that it invokes makes your mind spin in circles. You get the familiar feelings of nostalgia and then you remember what it felt like to fall in love… The sweetness of the feeling warms your heart while past heartache fades away into the farthest reaches of your mind.

You try to be rational, but that’s a lost cause, for your heart is anything and everything but rational. Suddenly, your attention is diverted away from it all as your body moves back and forth to the beats in the newfound anthem of your life. The pain is suddenly gone, replaced by the positive energy found in the tranquil melody. Between each note change, you’re reminded of the love, the hate, all that is wrong and right with the world… Its beauty overtakes you to the point of ecstasy while you fight back the tears of joy.

You really needed to hear it when you did… Because it reminds you of why you’re alive. You live for this feeling that is indescribable in just a few words… Except, maybe you can convey the emotion in a few words, only if they could be mixed in a blender: hope, freedom, peace, love… Maybe it’s just serenity that you’ve found… even if it’s just in the moment.

Shhh. Be quiet, or they’ll hear us…

“Shhh. Be quiet, or they’ll hear us,” she said in a whispered voice. I then exclaimed, “I have no shame!” Suddenly, she started talking in a normal speaking voice. I explained to her that sometimes I have volume control issues. She laughed it off, but she also realized that I was being serious. Throughout our conversation, she kept looking at me inquisitively as if she was repeating every word and questioning what I said back to herself in her own mind. Later that night, she surprised me by repeating something I had said back to me verbatim when I asked her for her opinion on something. It was her way of letting me know that she understood me. Most of all, this action told me that I mattered and I already had the answers to my own questions: even if I didn’t want to realize it. It seemed that our conversation had gone in a small circle, but it was slightly different this time around because of the small changes in the topic. The conversation flowed on its own without either of us feeling forced to say anything. Instead of small talk, I have yet to have a lackluster conversation with this woman. She understands me and doesn’t judge me for anything. Pure and unconditional acceptance allows us to talk about any topic without fear of embarrassment.

Have a meaningful conversation with someone today and actually listen to them rather than just hearing them. Active listening is a long-lost art form that should be practiced as often as possible.

via Daily Prompt: Conversation

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year to everyone that could potentially read this!

My mother always told me that what you’re doing on New Year’s Eve will have an influence on your activities for the rest of the year.

I think that if this evening will be an indication of what I’ll be doing, then I won’t mind it that much as I’m working and writing this New Year’s Eve. In addition, since I don’t drink alcohol,Β  I won’t have a hangover when I wake up so I can get a head start on some resolutions.

By only having a few resolutions, it will be easier on me for the next year to realize all of them. I’m a creature of habit. If I have too many changes at once, I think that I would become stressed out which would make it more difficult to change. If a habit can be formed in less than 30 days, then why not make it a healthy one for a change?

In 2018, I will:

  1. Get my license and a car
  2. Get in better shape and maintain it
  3. Write more often

In 2017, I accomplished a few things:

  1. I got a better job.
  2. I moved out on my own.
  3. I met some really cool people.
  4. I have quit smoking habitually. (However, I still vape and I have a cigarette every now and then.)
  5. I have realized that I can be independent, even if it is awkward at first.

Some psychologists say that being “too positive” for the New Year is a bad thing as when you don’t realize your goals, it leads to a negative experience. I have to respectfully disagree. I know that I won’t get all of the goals I’ve set forth all in the first month. You can take the entire year to get the goals done and some of the resolutions can’t be solved in a day or even a month, so it’s always good to be realistic. I know that I won’t be able to get into better shape in just a week!

I’m going to change the way that I live.Β It’s going to be a brutal first month. Rather than twiddle my thumbs, I’m going to start putting my spare time to better use. I don’t know what the year has in store for us, but I wish nothing but the best for all of us. I’m optimistic that it will be better than the last.

… Don’t discount yourself.

I was recently told by an older and wiser man to not discount the things that I’ve gone through this year… He said that even though it doesn’t seem like they were major changes, they were; I should be proud of what I’ve accomplished.

In January of this year, when I started a program, I told myself and my friends in my group that I was going to get a new job. In May, I ended up in a job that I absolutely love.

I graduate the program in January of 2018, which is almost right around the corner.

I had a breakup this year; I’ve been rejected more times than I’d like to admit. However, I’ve moved out on my own and I’m more independent than I’ve been in the past few years.

I have accomplished almost everything that I had sought to this year. The only thing that I haven’t been able to accomplish is in regard to my weight and fitness.

I’m going to have some spare income which will allow me to get a gym membership and hire a trainer. Because of my graduating the program, my schedule is going to open up and I might as well put the extra time to good use.

I’m going to get my license back in January and by mid February, I should have a car.

A lot has happened in the past year, even if it doesn’t seem like it to other people. The year has flown by and I’m glad to have been able to remain sane during it.

My resolutions are going to be simple for next year…

  1. Get in better shape by working out at least three times a week, using Snap Kitchen for food, and by working with my doctor.
  2. Get my license back and a car
  3. Get my finances in better order
  4. Quit nicotine

I’ve mostly quit smoking already and I’m down to 4-5mg/ml of nicotine inside my vape. I’m going to leave it at that for a while and then start reducing it again until I’m at zero.

I’m hopeful for next year. I’m sure that it’s going to be a lot better than this year. However, even though I had a couple of down points this year, it hasn’t been all that bad. Actually, it’s been a little awesome. πŸ™‚

… What do you write about?

So, earlier today, I was asked what I wrote about… I didn’t really have a good answer because the most writing that I’ve done lately has been on this blog.

I’ve been thinking about a few different stories; I don’t know which one I’m going to run with. However, I’m going to write random posts on here so that a story can potentially develop out of them… I’ll have them tagged with “Random” so that I can easily identify them.

Rather than the answer of “random shit from my life”, I think I should come up with a better answer… Although, that does describe most of my writing, even if it’s poetry, it’s still inspired by my actual life.